It is a well known folk truism that anger turned inwards=depression….But don’t just take my word for it, although it seems an obvious axiom that makes good common sense too, a rarity in the all too arcane and confusing mumbo jumbo world of modern day psychiatry and therapy….
In other words, according to my Google sources: “Psychoanalysts have long believed that anger towards others gets turned against ourselves. Our anger converted into self-hatred causes depression.” This depression will also inevitably be expressed, often in the most negative of ways….
When our anger towards others is suppressed and turned inwards, it leads to lowered self esteem, guilt, depression, and ultimately rage…The scientists have a lot of fancy theories as to how and why this exactly works, and of course they also have their disagreements….
But the main point is that it is healthier to express our anger at the time we first feel it than to suppress it…. And when we turn this anger inwards it just makes us feel angry at ourselves, which leads to feelings of lowered self esteem, which turns into depression as we feel powerless to change things…
I am not by any means advocating violence as a form of releasing our anger, but there is no real reason not to respond at the time at whoever you are angry at, to at least let them know how you feel about being put down or unjustly attacked…It happens a lot in domestic situations, where in some households husbands routinely beat their wives, yell at or hit their kids, and kick their dogs…
No woman should ever allow herself to be a punching bag anymore, there are many women’s shelters and domestic abuse counselors available these days….Just have the courage to reach out and ask for help, and I know it’s probably the hardest, bravest thing to do…For example:
“The W.O.M.A.N., Inc. 24-hour support line offers support via peer counseling, safety planning, and referrals for needed resources. Very often our support line is used as a safe space for survivors to openly share details of their lives including the abuse they survive.
As peer counselors, our role is to support them. Many times a survivor just needs someone to listen without judging, to help them better understand their experience, and to validate their feelings and choices.(415) 864-4722 or (877) 384-3578″….English and Spanish speaking counselors are available.
Besides the worst cases of domestic abuse, unfortunately, a lot of this anger is also caused by our bosses at work, especially if you are cursed with the nit picking, beady eyed, pig faced boss type who arrogantly assumes that his position in the work/office hierarchy automatically grants him (or her) a sense of entitlement and a false sense of superiority… I always tried to give back as good as I got…This work place fighting back can take various forms…
I have had bosses who were screamers, who would get right up in your face and scream “Do This Right Now!” and I just screamed back, “OK, I will!”…Instead of getting fired, as most people fear will always happen, the boss just accepted this as a normal means of communication….
Perhaps they were just hard of hearing, perhaps they considered this a normal workplace exchange, or a means of common communication, but as long as you do your job, these type of bosses rarely fire you for merely expressing displeasure back at them…They actually expect it, and you get the satisfaction of working out, instead of suppressing, your own anger and becoming depressed….
If the bosses ARE that vindictive, and some of them are so fat headed and swollen with their own false sense of superiority and power that they really do believe they are above accountability, employees are well within their rights to fight back passively…This can take many forms, such as through work slowdowns, or by doing only what you are expressly ordered to do, and nothing else…
Or by not volunteering or participating in any outside work functions, or by calling in sick at key busy times at work (with doctor documentation to protect yourself)… In more extreme cases by filing law suits with the US Department of Labor, especially if you feel you are being unjustly singled out on the basis of sexual, age or gender harassment reasons…..These are definitely illegal acts, and employers can and will be held legally responsible if you can prove your case….
Another example would be if you are aware of fraud and abuse, including verbal or sexual abuse, by your bosses or supervisors occurring in the work place on a regular and systematic basis…You can always look into hiring a “no fault” lawyer to handle your case…
Whistle blowers, as they are known in the vernacular, provide a well known service to the community and the society in general, from keeping bosses and large corporations from overstepping their bounds….You are legally protected while the case is being considered, and if it comes to a trial and the fraud or abuse can be proven, you can and will be well compensated…..
No fault lawyers are free to you, and they will only take your case if they think they can win….Even if the case is settled out of court, you will usually receive a healthy settlement …Often just the threat of legal action is enough to deter most bosses….
Always remember, your bosses have more to lose than you do….It definitely takes a certain amount of bravery to fight back like this, but in the long run you will feel better about yourself, and you will not feel the crippling effects of depression from turning all your anger inward in fear and frustration when simply fighting back is often just what you need to do….
The alternative is bleak…We have all heard the expression, again from my Google sources “Going postal, (which) in American English slang, means becoming extremely and uncontrollably angry, often to the point of violence, and usually in a workplace environment.
The expression derives from a series of incidents from 1986 onward in which United States Postal Workers (USPS) workers shot and killed managers, fellow workers, and members of the police or general public in acts of mass murder. Between 1986 and 1997, more than 40 people were gunned down by spree killers in at least 20 incidents of workplace rage.”
This is unfortunately a poorly conceived but inevitable result of not redressing the grievance and by not venting your anger in the first place…It is an overload of anger with tragic results that could have been avoided if these people had just refused to turn their anger inward, and held the person that made them so angry accountable when it first happened….
Depression from “biting our tongue” and holding back on expressing our anger at the time slowly but surely builds up inside of us, and when it boils over in instances like “going postal” or by being abusive in domestic situations in general, we all suffer as a society…Stop the violence in your own life first to avoid getting depressed and lashing out at innocent others…
It is far better to unleash our initial expressions of anger when we first feel them, rather than let them grow into a toxic over reaction of rage and running amok…Depression can be a killer…
And just remember: Anger Turned Inwards = Depression…..
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